This week… Procras10ation Episode 12 – The One Where 7 Ate 9 Star Wars. We crawl all over episodes 7 and 8 and cast some predictions toward episode 9. We hope we are right but who knows.  

Show Notes:

  • The first geek question to Daniel is a reference to about 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea.
  • Penelope Makes her appearance early in this episode.
  • Jason yawns and owes everyone a beer.
  • Phasma Episode 3.5.2: A Star Wars Story
  • Another yawn – another beer.
  • There is a brief Maxell/Memorex debate. Jason is thinking about two different commercials.
  • Walking Dead shout out to the Garbage Pail Kids chopped up zombie slurry.

The Force Awakens Procras10ation Episode 12 – The One Where 7 Ate 9 Star WarsEpisode VII: The Force Awakens

  • Very much a remake and an homage to A New Hope. It had humor, it had great CGI, you had those heroic moments, you had good acting. There were plenty of similarities to the movie that you liked.
  • You hated the prequels so here is a lot of stuff you liked out of the first one.
  • Kylo Ren stops a blaster bolt during the opening scenes of the movie. He can stop light. That is how powerful he is.
  • We think that Phasma took her helmet off during 7 but we really are not sure.
  • We meet Poe and Finn during the first few minutes of the movie and then you meet Rey and you start to like them immediately.
  • Then you get Princess Leia – immediately.
  • JJ Abrams corrected the badness of the prequels right off the bat.
  • What is the connection between Force Awakens and Black Panther? Lupita Nyong’o. She was the voice of Maz.
  • Jedi philosophy question: Is the Dark Side of the Force and the SIth the same thing or flavors of a religion.
  • We want Rey to be a Grey Jedi.
  • Han dying made us cry and part of it was because we had an actual actor. Fuckin’ Hayden Christensen. We got an Adam Driver and he can emote. When Yoda told all of the emotions that led to the Dark Side he was speaking about Adam Driver.
  • Jason digs into the argument about Kylo Ren being challenged by Finn. This argument if broken down.

The Last Jedi Procras10ation Episode 12 – The One Where 7 Ate 9 Star WarsEpisode VIII: The Last Jedi

  • Jason wants more Phasma.
  • People are missing the point that the Jedi are sneaky, sneaky bastards. Obi-Wan snuck all over the Death Star to get the Falcon out of the docking bay.
  • Luke dying was perfect. Loved the fact that he used the force to trick Kylo Ren and the First Order while not even on the planet. Luke made himself look like he did when he was almost considering murdering Kylo. This was a guy that had not used the force in a long time. He had been living on the planet milking this weird creature and drinking its teat milk. It was worse that he stared at Rey the whole time. We speculate that this might have been a huge pimple.
  • Daisy Ridley’s WTF face is fantastic.
  • Yoda burns down the tree of knowledge. That might have been in the garden of Eden or in the movie Hook – we aren’t sure which.
  • There should have been a pic of Lando behind the door when the come into the casino like he had been banned from the casino – holding a Colt 45.

Episode 9 Procras10ation Episode 12 – The One Where 7 Ate 9 Star WarsEpisode IX: Un-Named

  • Maybe we get a mention of Order 66 during Episode 9.
  • Jason wants Vince Vaughn to be in Episode 9 as Benecio’s best friend.
  • We think we will get to see Leia pass away at some point in 9. The older characters have to die in these movies so that you can hand the story off to the new generation of heroes.
  • Our predictions:
    • Leia has to die and Kylo might kill her. He killed his father and has to kill his mother, maybe.
    • Kylo might be changing over to the light side but maybe not.
    • Does Kylo actually know anything about Rey’s parents? Are Rey’s parents just a red herring?
    • Snoke getting killed means that all bets are off. Anything can happen and anyone might die.
    • Yoda and Luke haunt Kylo throughout this movie.

Procras10ation Episode 12 – The One Where 7 Ate 9 Star Wars – we are done with our triliogy of Star Wars films for the time being. There are more coming out so you know we will revisit this topic.


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